Break away from being a people pleaser
Standing up and engaging in conflict is an absolute unknown and a fear if you're a people pleaser. Most often than not, you're actually not in the wrong but people will take advantage of you because they can see that you're the perfect person for them to push their ego on to.
Standing up for yourself is not easy when you're not used to it but if not tackled at all it can build up overtime and leave you feeling deflated and severely lack self esteem.
Tips:
- Daily practice replacing the word 'Sorry' with something else. Apologising for no reason lowers your self esteem hugely
- Take 1 small recurring situation and respond with a slight delay. Use the time to think about what you actually want. No matter what it is, you are entitled to an opinion. Respond with saying no instead of yes if it's something you want to do. We tend to reply instantly out of panic and with the intention of not wanting to let that person down.
- If someone says something to hurt you, gently explain to them that their words weren't right. Sometimes that will feel really tough and unnatural and if it does, pull back slightly and respond with a non emotional and shorter response. Do NOT apologise out of fear.
- Sometimes saying less is more. The more you say the more you dig a hole and less dignity you hold. You'll be reacting emotionally. By saying less, you will be saying something you have thought about and to the point, and hold yourself highly.
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